Post by thecommentatorHave found some links to sites for audio files, the one I'm trying to
get hold of is "The Four Yorkshiremen".
Anyone have a link to this file at all?
Couldn't find the audio (in the amount of time I was willing to spend
doing a Google search for you), But I did find this script at;
http://www.montypythonpages.com/index1.htm
The "We Were Poor" Sketch
From "Monty Python Live at City Center" and
"Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl"
Four well-dressed men sitting together at a vacation resort. "Farewell
to Thee" being played in the background on Hawaiian guitar.
Michael Palin: Ahh.. Very passable, this, very passable.
Graham Chapman: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine,
ay Gessiah?
Terry Gilliam: You're right there Obediah.
Eric Idle: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here
drinking Chateau de Chassilier wine?
MP: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o'
tea.
GC: A cup ' COLD tea.
EI: Without milk or sugar.
TG: OR tea!
MP: In a filthy, cracked cup.
EI: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a
rolled up newspaper.
GC: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
TG: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
MP: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money
doesn't buy you happiness."
EI: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live
in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
GC: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room,
all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was
missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
TG: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a
corridor!
MP: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a
palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We
got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all
over us! House!? Hmph.
EI: Well when I say "house" it was only a hole in the ground covered by
a piece of tarpaulin, but it was a house to US.
GC: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live
in a lake!
TG: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us
living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
MP: Cardboard box?
TG: Aye.
MP: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a
septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning,
clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for
fourteen hours a day, week in, week out. When we got home, our Dad would
thrash us to sleep with his belt!
GC: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in
the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at
the mill every day for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would beat
us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
TG: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox
at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We
had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a
day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our
Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
EI: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half
an hour before I went to bed, (pause for laughter), eat a lump of cold
poison, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for
permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad would kill us,
and dance about on our graves singing "Hallelujah."
MP: But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't
believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope.
Phil
--
Pfft...English! Who needs that? I'm never going to England.
Homer J. Simpson